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The first thing to understand about toilet training is the child you are trying to move from diapers to panties/underwear isn’t like any other child.
No matter if everyone says their son or daughter quit using diapers by the age of two, it makes no difference if your child is still in diapers when they turn three. Every child is different and will learn their bodies on their own schedules.
Many parents feel extreme pressure to have their child potty trained by a set age. This usually falls somewhere between two to three years old.
Day care centers, pre-schools, and baby sitters expecting a parent to be “in control” of their child’s urine and bowel habit isn’t going to make the child potty train any faster. These entities usually have to staff differently if they have to attend to an older child who is not toilet trained. Pressure from them can lead a parent to think they are doing something terribly wrong. This is false.
Having a child who isn’t toilet trained by the “expected age” isn’t a failure by anyone, especially not the child. Understand that potty training doesn’t happen overnight and many times not over a weekend. The has to figure out his/her body in order to know the cues. In some children this happens at eighteen months, in others at four years.
The big tips to keep in mind are to be consistent, be patient, be positive, and most especially--be calm.
As my child psychology professor told me, “Your child won’t go to prom in a diaper, so don’t worry about it.”